This Blog is Now Inactive

Greetings one last time from TechnoMonk’s Musings here at technomonk.us. If you’re reading this, it would be because the Blogger system finally let me back in to publish again. (I have gone several days now without being able to access the system.)

Blogger is a free service. You definitely get what you pay for. But, thank you Blogger for facilitating the last 11 months of blogging experience for me.

Yes, this is the final post to TechnoMonk’s Musings at this address — but I’m not going away. You can’t get rid of me that easily!

Please join me at the upgraded version of these Musings at technomonksmusings.com. Thanks for sticking with me! I’ll see you there!

Moving On

I know, I know...I said last time that “I’m baaaacck” ...and then I went away again. You just can’t trust anybody anymore, can you?

The truth is I thought I was back, but it proved to be not true; I continued to be locked out again (after that last entry). This most recent experience with Blogger is pretty much the last straw for me. As you may recall, when I migrated TechnoMonk’s Musings away from its Comcast-server location (to the present URL) during the summer, I spent weeks and weeks devoted to the task. When things went kafloowie, I just had to figure the problems out by: sorting through the meager Blogger help files, asking questions of the Blogger Help Group (discussion board), using Google to search the internet for solutions that other users had come up with, writing emails to people I thought might be able to assist, figuring it all out by myself, or leaving a task undone. (Not that you, the reader, noticed very much of this at all…I’m mainly talking about behind-the-scenes web-maintenance stuff.) Anyway, it was very time consuming and frustrating.

Of course, let’s be fair here, too. Blogger is a free service and was very attractive to me last November when I got the itch to start a blog: in the space of a couple of hours I went from a blogless person to posting my first entry here on TechnoMonk’s Musings. There was not a whole lot of research or deliberateness about this whole thing...I explored a couple of no-cost options on the web and picked one. And here I’ve stayed ever since, despite the problems.

But it’s now time to move on, I believe. Blogger was good while it lasted, but I’ve been at this business long enough now (148 posts prior to this one) to know that I desire options and features on my blog not easily available to me here. (Reliability and support are two that come to mind...) Hence, I’ve started the research in order to make a change (more deliberately this time)...I will pick software and/or a service that will better serve my blogging wants and needs.

Just so you know: I won’t try to migrate this blog onward. I’ll leave it all behind to serve as 11 months worth of “archives.” I intend to obtain another domain name, establish the blog, and take up there where I left off here...just with another “look and feel” for my web presence.

So, stay tuned...I'll let you know when I’m really back...

Slacker

Ok, ok, I know: where have I been?!

Well, it’s not like I haven’t been writing or attempting to post. The blankety-blank Blogger system hasn’t been letting me in! I have tried and tried to get the software to cooperate, but at some point since the October 15th post, things just went kafloowie. If that’s a word. Probably not.

Well, but things are better now. I’m back.

The N-Zone

I’ve talked off and on here about my diagnosis of chronic myofascial pain, provided some thoughts about surviving this disease and the treatment process, and most recently, discussed the trigger-point injection therapy I began a couple of weeks ago.

Here’s a little addendum to the story that I’ll now share with you…

During the first appointment at the doctor’s office where we performed trigger-point injections, skittish-(around-needles)-person that I am, I allowed only four injections. The second time, a few days later, was a session with 19 injections. That extremely-intense ordeal was on a Monday morning, and, as it followed a weekend of suffering through some intense back and foot pain, I experienced some much-needed relief during the course of that day. However, by that evening, I had pretty much returned to “normal.” (This was not a good thing, of course…the pain had returned!) In fact, by the end of the week (on that Friday), I was hurting so much that I made and kept an appointment with my chiropractor in Eugene, where I obtained some pain abatement with the (for me, usual) treatment modes of ultrasound, light massage, and a small chiropractic adjustment.

My injection-therapy doc was going to be out of town for a bit, so the first chance I had to return to him was Monday morning of this week. While there, I reported on my status, including the few-hours-only relief I obtained as a result of the 19 injections last time.

Of course, I had been discouraged at not experiencing more relief as a result of that previous visit, but, still, was rather unprepared for the assessment that injections were not going to be the preferred treatment for me. The “typical patient” tends to respond much more positively than I did, apparently.

I had been warned that this (injection) path might be more problematic for me than others, though. In reporting my medical history, I of course had disclosed that I had been taking lorazepam (“Ativan”) during the last several months in an attempt to cope with the anxiety-factors of my life (job loss, interviewing, moving…that kind of stuff). As it turns out, and as I had been informed, taking a drug in the bezodiazepine class can sometimes (oftentimes) seriously get in the way of having a successful outcome from trigger-point injections. And this doctor, while having treated only a few individuals who were taking (or had taken) this type of drug, had first-hand experience in seeing such cases as mine “fail.” I had been off the drug for a full three weeks at the time of my injections (and, now, as I write this, it’s been over five weeks), but the effect that the drug can have on the body (at least as far as trigger-point injections go) can be much longer lasting than would typically be predicted from the elimination half-life.

So, what to do now? (was the question) I had been studying the Trigger Point Therapy Workbook and doing my own self-massage of trigger points (with the help of a variety of massage “tools” that I now own). But this approach seems to have yielded little progress, especially regarding my back pain. (It’s possible that the condition in my left leg and foot is somewhat improved.)

I asked the doc what we could to do to pursue an alternative treatment path. Fortunately, he had some ideas (several of them, actually). One possible approach that emerged was to take small doses of a drug, naltrexone, once a day (at bedtime) for thirty days. Naltrexone is an “anti-narcotic” usually prescribed to manage alcohol and opiate addiction. However, in low doses (3 mg vs. the typical 50 mg), the drug has been found to be advantageous for a variety of ailments. The hypothesis regarding this drug’s biochemical mechanism (magic?) is that it produces an increase in endorphin levels in the body, which positively impact muscle tissue (and myofascial trigger points, in my case). In people with diseases that are partially or largely triggered by a deficiency of endorphins (CMP and fibromyalgia are thought to be in this category), or are accelerated by a deficiency of endorphins, restoration of the body’s normal production of endorphins is believed to be the major therapeutic action of (low-dose) naltrexone.

Now, I had never heard of this drug prior to two days ago. But, I admit, this theory and approach are fairly attractive: a low dose of a drug purported to have “no side effects” and that does not involve frequent, multiple and painful needles in my body. Further, the success rate of this approach for individuals with my condition is supposedly quite high (the pharmacist said that, in his experience, this approach works “about 90% of the time”).

I took the first dose last night at bedtime, after discovering that “low-dose naltrexone” (LDN) has its own website and listserv on yahoogroups. I have started to do the reading and the research, though it may be several days before I have any “results” of this experiment to talk about.

Stay tuned for further updates on my naltrexone experience…

TechnoMonk's Photos

Self Portrait
Originally uploaded by technomonk.

Just so you know: even when I’m not writing and posting (and thereby giving you something new and exciting to read), this blog is always on my mind. I’m always thinking of ways to improve the experience here…for example, you may have noticed the little addition to the sidebar section on the left-hand side of this page during this last week. I now have an account at flickr.com where I am able to display my photos (all in one place) and then link them to this blog (as in the self-portrait to the right). To reach my online photo collection, you may click on the larger image in the little flickr box. For this and future posts that have photos, click on the image and it will take you to an enlarged version (as well as the complete photo collection).

Senioritis

Here is a mildly disturbing development in my life...

I drove into town to run an errand during the noon hour today. While there, I decided to have lunch at the Subway shop closest to my apartment. As I was at the register to pay for my turkey sandwich and chips, the young man said, “that’ll be $4.70...or do you do the senior discount?” To which I stammered, “excuse me? Uh. No.”

Holy craperino, Batman! This is the first time such a thing has happened to me, and it caught me completely off guard. What, I wondered, about my appearance today, merited this promotion to senior status?!?

Yeah, yeah…I know. I’m 59. I’m an AARP member. I have some gray hair. But, geezzzz. He had to SAY IT OUT LOUD?

Now, I hadn’t had a bad day to that point, and the rest of day went mostly ok too. There is just this one little blip that sticks with me.

Senior discount? Moi?

Prime Time Wisdom

The popular TV show Grey’s Anatomy is filmed in Seattle, and maybe its Pacific Northwest roots are part of the appeal for me. (This season the show made a move to 9:00 p.m. on Thursdays, so it is on ABC an hour before ER airs at 10:00 p.m. on NBC; I tape them both and watch them on the weekend). Aside from its obvious (and frequent) quirkiness, the show has real and touching moments that occasionally tend to unearth some truths about life and relationships.

Last Thursday’s Sometimes a Fantasy really caught my attention. Most episodes are filled with several different story lines, with some, not uncommonly, continuing from week-to-week. And the story of Izzie’s loss resumed this time. She had fallen in love with a heart-transplant patient who had asked her to marry him. However, shortly after he popped the question (and after Izzie had made an ethically-questionable call about his care), he died. Izzie’s story was juxtaposed with one about Megan, a young girl who came to the emergency room with multiple injuries. Although she was bruised, beaten, scarred and had stapled a wound on her arm with an office stapler, she claimed to feel no pain. The ultimate diagnosis for her was “chronic insensitivity to pain.” (Who knew there was such a thing!?)

So, he we had: Megan, dramatically physically damaged, who claimed to feel “no pain.” And Izzie, who stood immobilized outside the hospital, unable to motivate herself to return to work, when asked where it hurt, said “everywhere.”

The array of possible human experiences always tends to amaze me. In this dramatization, one person feels immense, debilitating, chronic, paralyzing pain, and the other, none at all.

During the operation on Megan, the surgeon observes that “everybody wants a life without pain. What does it get you? She needs to be on a poster somewhere to remind people that pain’s there for a reason.”

I know, I know. This is a TV show. But the writing, this week, seemed incredibly good…and provided a degree of wisdom than one typically does not encounter during prime time.

Of course, these observations extend my previous commentaries. You know that I think about pain a lot; and an episode of a medical drama focusing on the topic is bound to attract my attention and dwell in my thoughts. Six days ago, in an attempt to address my chronic myofascial pain issues (including my long-standing chronic lower-back pain), I allowed a doctor to inject me 19 times with small amounts of Marcaine in my first major attempt at trigger-point injection therapy. Although I experienced some short-term relief that day, by the evening I was back to “normal.” And, as my back pain has been the predominant factor in my existence the last couple weeks, I drove to Eugene to see my chiropractor on Friday.

If “pain’s there for a reason,” I ask, “what is it?”

I struggle with this question.

More Business

My present employment situation, while a little crazy given all the rather unusual campus dynamics, is feeling mostly comfortable. It would seem that I am welcomed, accepted, and that I’m actually making a bit of a difference. For the time being, it’s not a bad “fit.” This is all pretty wonderful, actually.

But I’ve been thinking about how the school year will evolve, and wondering whether or not this job is going to last any longer than my current 11-month contract. Everything is up in the air, and the talk on campus regarding an examination of the “administrative structure” is just that: talk. The process for determining what the organizational chart will ultimately look like is an unknown one at this point. In the meantime, I am looking at an agreement that says I’m employed only until June 30th. Without any knowledge of how this will all play out, I obviously have no clue whether or not there’ll be a position for me to apply for.

So, I’m taking care of business. As I indicated in my last post, I’ve updated my resumé. Additionally, I’ve prepared some application “starter kits” (right now, a dozen 9x12 mailing envelopes, each containing copies of my transcripts from UW-EC, OSU and IU). I’ve purchased an ambitious supply of black inkjet cartridges. I’m stocked with six reams of Kodak Bright White inkjet paper. And, as of a few days ago, I have emails automatically coming to me from the Chronicle of Higher Education whenever there’s a job posted in my five target states (WA, OR, CA, AZ, NM). The one remaining task for me to be “job-app ready” is to revise my stock cover letter to incorporate a description of my most recent experience here at UCC.

You have no idea how much I hate the thought of another year (or more!) of applications and interviews. Or of moving. Or of starting my life over yet again. But, we do what we have to do.

Here I go. Sigh...

TCB

Just so you know: I’m now paying a little more attention to my other virtual home (at jimarnold.us). I started to revise that website when I was moving this summer (and subsequently changed over to the new domain name) … and then, of course, got distracted with major life transitions: the new job, the new home, the new city, and the blog migration issues here at TechnoMonk’s Musings. Having achieved some modicum of stability here at technomonk.us, I’ve just got to get my other site in order, since that has been how folks “out there” have typically tracked me down for my consulting work.

I now have my updated resumé online as well.

Maturity

Funny thing: the very night I post the link to the “hugs” video, a war begins with my neighbor. Three occupants of this building (that I know of) have now lodged complaints with the office regarding her (and/or her boyfriend’s) behavior and, as I am surely one of them, I’m the lucky (and obvious) target of an immature retaliation.

The stereo is up even louder than normal tonight, so I needed to go over there again (this is perhaps the 10th time) to ask that the volume be lowered: which I did, calmly and respectfully. I was greeted very coolly when she opened the door, but I smiled and quite evenly suggested that if she could lower the volume, it would help me out a lot. She replied “well, I’ll see what I can do to help!” …whereupon I had the door slammed directly into my astonished face.

So, here we go. Unfriendly. AND noisy. Great.

Free Hugs Campaign

From YouTube (click to view the video...):

“Sometimes, a hug is all what we need. ‘Free Hugs’ is the real life controversial story of Juan Mann, a man whose sole mission was to reach out and hug a stranger to brighten up their lives.

In this age of social disconnectivity and lack of human contact, the Free Hugs campaign emerged. As this symbol of human hope spread across the city, police and officials ordered the Free Hugs campaign BANNED.

What we then witness is the true spirit of humanity come together in what can only be described as awe-inspiring.

In the spirit of the free hugs campaign, PASS THIS TO A FRIEND and HUG A STRANGER!

After all, If you can reach just one person...”

The November Election

This coming November, Oregon voters face a potential twin-towers of ballot measures. My opinion: NO votes on both Measure 41 and Measure 48 are crucial to the future of the state, as the effects could be more devastating to our education systems (and other state services) than was Ballot Measure 5 in 1990. Click on the links above to read what The Oregonian had to say when they weighed in on these matters. And then head on over the Defend Oregon Coalition website.

This is important!

Anxiety Factors

I suggested yesterday that the pace I kept leading up to the start of classes was an energy-depleting one. For me, of course, it’s not only the job that tends to wear me down, it’s the entire rest of my life. For example, in addition to commencing the school year this last week, I had two doctor appointments. The anxiety resulting from this schedule contributed to my fatigue, I’m sure.

The first of these appointments was with my urologist. As I’ve aged (I’m now almost done with my fifties), I have had to increasingly struggle with BPH; this is a condition I monitor carefully. Consequently, I have blood drawn for a PSA test every six months to assist in this process and to rule out prostate cancer (as my PSA level continues to slowly rise). About four years ago, my PSA number was of sufficient concern that I underwent a prostate biopsy. The rigors of this every-six-months examination, as well as the ever-present specter of cancer (or, simply, another invasive biopsy), probably are the reasons my blood pressure was up slightly for this appointment. Luckily, my PSA was more-or-less unchanged from last time and there are no obvious indicators, from the physical part of the exam, that I have cancer. This kind of news is always such a relief!

The second appointment of the week was the follow-up to my CMP diagnosis of last month. The blood work that I’d had done came back with an array of acceptable numbers, including my cholesterol and triglycerides. My HDL (“good cholesterol”) result was especially encouraging to me (I must be doing something right!). And my blood pressure at the beginning of this appointment was much better news than a couple days earlier.

At the previous appointment, I had been advised that I should stop the anti-anxiety medication I had been taking (to help with sleeping) if we were going to make progress on the chronic myofascial pain issues. I have since weaned myself from this drug successfully, and am now able, apparently, to pursue a treatment path. The treatment recommended is trigger-point injections, as this physician has been doing such therapy with his patients for about 15 years and reports many stunning successes.

So, I have now started down this road. Typically, he states, about 18 trigger points are injected during a session. I allowed him to do only 4 injections during my appointment (and only after a one-hour talking consultation), however, as I’m not totally convinced, after doing my research, that this is the best route to go. But, I got modest, temporary symptom relief on Friday and I’m going back tomorrow for the next step. We’ll see how this all works out.

I guess the last thing to report (for this entry anyway) about current experiences contributing to my anxiety and fatigue, is the noise element in my life (and the resulting, somewhat-tenuous relationship with my neighbor in this apartment complex). The bass vibes from the stereo keep coming through my living-room wall. The kids keep screaming as they run up and down the stairs. The adults keep slamming their door. And I keep feeling like I need to run away.

After a few weeks now of talking to my neighbor as frequently as once a week, when I handed in my rent check yesterday to the office, I mentioned my uncomfortable living situation to the manager on duty. Unfortunately, I did not get the sympathetic, good-listener ear I was hoping for. I was told, though, that they would give the neighbor a written notice about the complaint. I’m betting that this has happened already, as the reception I received on the stairs this morning was quite a cool one.

For now, though, I’m sure I can live with an unfriendly neighbor as long as she’s a quiet one.

Work, health, pain, doctors, needles, noise, neighbors. My life. And anxiety.